Friday, June 10, 2011

Sad/Glad

Don't know if Atticus has realized it yet, but that is not how to play the piano.

Recently, we moved the piano into my house. Daddy has Alzheimer's and he does not play anymore. due to the progression of the disease, Mama had to make some changes in the house, and the piano was in the way.

I am happy to have the piano, and have missed being able to play every day, but my heart is breaking because of the circumstances. Alzheimer's is a cruel disease, and steals so much from the victims and their families. It has stolen Daddy's ability to play and enjoy music. He no longer plays the piano, and I can't even get him to sing with me anymore. Admittedly, it is painful to see this chapter of our lives closing. I want him to sing with me again, my heart aches for those times that he whistled and I sang, we sang together or sat at the piano playing and singing. They are gone, and will not return. This cruel disease claims another victory with this loss.

The ray of sunshine that we find is in the short moments that we are able to see Daddy, just being Daddy. Those times are fewer and farther between, making those few seconds that he is himself even more precious. But I am grateful for those times that I am able sit and talk to him, and find that my Daddy is himself, even if it lasts only for a moment.

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